Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Dating a Porn Star

Would you? A common question I ask amongst my male friends, and my answer is, I would. I would totally date a porn star. But not just any porn star, but Tori Black. Maybe Stoya as well because she fill my archetype of the type of female I am attracted to, but more specifically Tori Black. Why her you ask? Because Tori Black does not look like your normal porn star. You might be able to find a handful of women in the industry that don't look like your average porn star, but you might not find one that looks like she belongs in the Miss USA pageant.

Tori Black is gorgeous. She is a terrific performer, yes I say performer, and if she wasn't in this specific area of film, she could do Hollywood film based on her looks alone. There are plenty of A-list actresses getting by on their looks alone (Megan Fox), so I don't see where the argument should be if she could act or not. The mass majority of people would find Tori Black attractive, even if they knew what her profession was. Her beauty has you look passed what she's doing.

Jeff Koons was married to a porn star and he put out some of his best work at the time. Her fucking other dudes on camera had no effect on the work he put out. She was his muse. I'm not saying I would date Tori Black for my own personal goals, but it would be nice to have my own personal Venus de Milo. But a hotter one. Andy Warhol's muse was a whore (Edie Sedgewick), she was boning Bob Dylan, and that effected him. (Now while that might not be 100% true, based on the movie Factory Girl, he was all pissy about it). Why because her fucking wasn't emotionally detached. Which lays out the most important thing about dating a pornstar.

All the fucking that they do is emotionally detached. And it's not like they are fucking EVERYDAY. They fly out to L.A., home of the porn, shoot three scenes, make three thousand smackers, and go back home and chill. Granted they might do that 3 to four times a month, but still, it's not EVERYDAY. Plus, the guys in porn are slim, it's not like she's fucking every John Doe who manages to keep it up for 20+ minutes. It's strictly business. Beej here, missionary, doggy, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, sideways and money shot. No intimacy, no nothing. And because she's a performer, it's not like she MEANS the things she says like "fuck my pussy harder" or "I love your big dick in me". It's all a front.

The other thing about Tori Black is that she's no racist. I've seen her bang plenty of black dudes in her earlier days, so it's not like she has anything against skin color. I'm brown, might not be hung like Cockzilla, but still, there is a slight hope that she might be attracted to me as well. They say that when you do interracial, you're not worth as much in the porn industry, but in my heart you are. In my heart, you are. So what she's been impaled worse than some of Vlad the Impaler's foes. So what if her eyes get wide at the sight of an 8 inch soft wiener. Wouldn't yours? It's all business.

Dating a porn star, you know they are about the emotional aspect of it as well. They aren't dating you because you are ripped and have a big schlong. They get those dudes during their 9-5. The time they are with you is for the emotional and mental comforting. And it's not like they WON'T fuck you. They probably will, and it will mean more because the love is there. You know? That emotional chemistry. For once during their week, they can have normal sex. They don't need to take a giant load to the face. And they'll be glad that the sex doesn't have to last more than 15 minutes to meet a time goal. But it's all emotional. She might fuck other dudes but it's not cheating. Plus if you knew she was fucking other dudes before you started dating her, it wouldn't be cheating anyway. It's when she gets an emotional attraction to someone else is when she's cheating. See Cyclops and Emma Frost.

But back to Tori Black. She's amazing to look at, has a killer smile, and a body to die for. So what if she might get implants down the line. She'd be doing it to reach a broader audience. And because she's a porn star, she'll mainly be recognized by guys, and because she's not in the Hollywood business it's not like she would be recognized right away. So you wouldn't have to worry about getting too much attention when you are out with her. And what I'd keep in mind is that just because she fucks a lot on camera, doesn't mean she'd fuck any dude off camera. So worrying about attractive dudes trying to scoop her up at a bar would be silly. She gets paid to get with guys like that, why would she do it for free? Plus I have an amazing personality, I don't see why a girl would want to leave that for some dude who looks like a guy she works with.

I mean just look at that smile. How can that not make your heart melt?


Look at that body. Granted I am not a big fan of the decal on the bath suit, it's not what I'm ONLY paying attention too.


She cleans up well. This might not be your prototypical dress you'd see during the evening gown section of the Miss USA pageant, but you know if she wanted to, she could KILL it.


Oh she fucks on camera for a living? Looks like your average college student to me.


Tori Black is also my age and 3 months younger than me. So what she's 21 and doing porn. When did you start having sex? So what she's fucked a lot of guys. How many girls do you know that have fucked a lot of guys, and not for professional reasons either? She's good at what she does. She seems like she'd be a terrific date, and that I could make her laugh. Oh she was also 2010 AVN Female Performer of the Year. If it so happens she wants to give you more than just your regular love making, she could give you the time of your life. AND I'd be able to be her date to next years AVNs. People would be like "Damn Alan, you got the hottest porn star girlfriend". and I'd be like, "Thanks, bro".

Miss Black, I salute you. And if by some chance you google your name and this blog post comes up and you read it. Shoot me an e-mail. I live close to NYC which is better than L.A. anyway, and I wouldn't mind at all accompanying you to L.A. to shoot any scenes. I think you're swell.

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